Thursday, December 4, 2008

Just What I Need

Tomorrow night I have my first Christmas party of the season. There will be alcohol there, lots of wine. It's funny because my mother-in-law remarked about how running out of wine last year so she was making sure there was more this year. I chuckled to myself because she won't be needing the extra wine considering I don't drink anymore. I wonder if she'll make the connection.

I went to a noon meeting today and shared how I've been thinking about this party all week. A lot. I've done the maybe I'm not really an alcoholic kind of thinking. Yesterday I opened my Big Book and read chapter More About Alcoholism, just what I needed. And today's meeting was about how powerful our disease really is, just what I needed.

It's so awesome to see God provide what I need.


Cat said...

Tyra - Good luck with the party - I know you will see it through because clearly you are not alone in this - God has your back.


Gabriella Moonlight said...

This is a great post, you know that is how the program has always worked for me, when I've been able to reach out and say why or what is going on the answers are always there. I am always reminded that this is a cunning, baffling and powerful disease. Thank you for sharing and we'll all be thinking of you! Keep us posted!

steveroni said...

Yep, Tyra, nobody is going to hold you down and force alcohol down your throat, you know that.

And you do not need any fancy answers for the party-goers.

Remember there is always a place you can go for the moment, a bathroom, a kitchen, bedroom. Maybe you even have a phone and a sponsor's number? Or somone's? Prayers coming atcha tomorrow.

Anybeth said...

You'll be fine, I know it. You'll feel great. just have a non-alcoholic drink in your hands at all times.
love ya' on blogger.

Shadow said...

good luck with the party. i remember how hard i found it too in the beginning. didn't know how to act, what to do, what to say, felt like a stranger in my own body. but don't worry, it gets easier every time you do it. try to enjoy it!

steveroni said...

Just remember, please, Tyra, a non-alcoholic drink does NOT mean "non-alcoholic beer", or "non-alcoholic sparkling wine,"...and this is not just an opinion -grin.

In those cases, "non-alcoholic" means: 'just a teensy little bit of alcohol'...but I realize you, and everyone else knows this. In our group, several people have gone out, not to return, after "doing" that stuff.

When the champagne gets distributed, ginger ale looks just like it. OK?

♥Shann♥ said...

God is awesome! I am glad you are sharing about these things

molly said...

for some reason i tend to have step 1 doubts during PMS. hormones fluctuating perhaps. gawd knows - i have a very questioning mind!

When i went through step 1 with first sponsor, i did not get it completely. i still had the 'lurking notion' (p 33 in the BB): "there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol". This is a step one requirement. With my 2nd sponsor i was able to meet that requirement. It's hard to explain the differences in approach in a post but there was clearly, for me, a 'hopelessness - of 'never again'' the 2nd time around that was needed for me to move forward.

i believe there will always be doubts at certain times as i go along simply b/c i'm just not in pain anymore. the ego can creep in and tell me 'i'm fine now - a sip won't hurt'. the ego is a big fat liar.!

if no one has explained the allergy / obsession aspect AND the progressive nature of the disease, please email me - i'd love to help if i can. sometimes those extremely important points don't make it across.

have fun!!! at the party - sounds great :)

Faith said...

Hi! Thanks for the comment! It's my first sober season with my family too, so some of them are rather shocked to not see me partake. You have so many days behind you - great job!


Faith said...

ps I loaded up on sparkling grape juice and sparkling cider. Yummy!!!

Faith said...

I added a ODAAT thingy like you have to track my days =)

J-Online said...

I found your blog. I like it! I'm going to a party Saturday night that will have lots of alcohol. I'll be in touch with my sponsor a lot that night!

Pam said...

Yes. God is awesome and he loves alcoholics! We're the willing group.