It's Monday. I was hoping to have the day to myself but it wasn't to be. Trevor is home sick-nasty head cold and sore throat. And Abby had a complete and utter meltdown this morning and I could not get her out the door short of physically doing so. I've never had any of my children behave that way and honestly, I'm at a loss as to what to do. I feel keeping her home wasn't the best choice but I couldn't very well send her in the state she was in.
She's been having some problems with a couple of girls in her class. Nothing extreme but I know it's hard on her. She's been begging me to switch classes and I don't know if that is the right thing to do either. I've never done that before.
Basically I just don't know about anything right now.
I'm tired. I'm anxious. I had to leave a meeting Friday night because I thought I was going to throw up. Yesterday I went to a meeting and was sitting outside feeling the same way. I was starting to feel panicky and I wanted to leave, I didn't think I could stay. Thankfully my old sponsor and my friend Amy (who is one awesome AA) showed up and we sat outside in the freezing cold and Amy talked me through it. I was able to stay for the meeting and I felt better for it.
Thank God for good AA friends.
I know that nothing in God's world happens by mistake. I know that everything is going to work out just the way it's supposed to. But man has this been hard. I've been working on my 4th step and this whole situation with Ally has brought up even more that I need to add to my list.
Today I'm going to take it easy. I'm going to try and visit some blogs even if all I do is say hi. I'm going to work on the baby blanket I'm crocheting. I may even take a nap. I'm going to eat powdered sugar mini donuts and drink a cup of hot coffee. I'm going to drink diet coke or two. If nothing else comes up, I may attend the new Big Book study at the club.
I'm going to take care of me today.
find your fire
1 day ago